Who is she?

She takes photos but doesn't see herself in them, she looks in the mirror and can't recognize the reflection. Filters, or not, makeup, or not. I'm not who I want to be but who is she? Does she eat? Is she satisfied? What was the cost? Injections, going under a knife? Is it worth it? Does she feel like it's enough? Is it ever enough? 

More, more, more. 

The little girl. Neglected, isolated, sheltered but far from safe. The little girl who I now have to work to heal. The little girl whom I must learn to love. You were broken so young. Flashbacks, memories stored in the dungeons of the mind. I have to fill any stillness to survive because when I'm still, it all comes back.